Life Lesson #1: Silence is Powerful. Use it to your advantage.

My old pal Vito has mastered this lesson

Buongiorno my followers and fellow inhabitants of Monte Cristo Isle!

Today’s post, the first lesson of the blog, will be about silence.

Over time, silence has been perceived in several ways. For some, it is a sign of weakness. For others, a lack of communication skills. Many link silence to awkwardness and, in arguments, to defeat. You’ve most likely, my faithful follower, came across at least one of the above definitions of silence in your lifetime. What if I were to tell you that all of these are not necessarily the case; that the silence you oftentimes avoid actually has a strong side, a touch of wisdom, that you begin to understand the more you practice it? As I tend to keep things to the point, let us not waste any time and dive right in:

6 Benefits of Silence

  1. The more information you reveal to people, the greater the chances of your words being used against you. This applies to everyone – your family, friends, and especially – enemies. Information is power and by remaining silent, you obtain it rather than give it away. Words also give away your emotions, always talk in a calm manner.
  2. When you find yourself in an argument or on the edge of engaging in one, silence helps. From a 3rd-person’s perspective, the person who shuts-up first demonstrates better self-control and wisdom. The silence may also allow the other person in the argument to reassess the situation, especially if accompanied by a calm look in their eyes, or if they’re foolish it’ll enrage them even more. Better to stay silent in the first place – as it takes two to make an argument and ruin your relations.
  3. Silence is attractive. Ever heard of charisma? Well, that is a skill linked to passionate stares, light-hearted smiles, and confidence. Do you see “talking” here? I don’t. In fact the more you talk, the less mysterious you become and trust me – that kills attraction and all excitement associated with it. Of course you may flirt and hold small-talk, but never turn dialogues into monologues.
  4. Being silent means you listen more. Everyone loves talking and, by listening, you show them that you care. It gives people joy when they are heard and understood – hence, you will undoubtedly make friends everywhere you go. Keep your phrases short and let them do the talking.
  5. Silence is intimidating, use it to your advantage. Forget awkwardness, it may be used as a weapon to build pressure. Let’s say, for example, you are a detective and ask the suspect: “I don’t want to send you to jail for 24 months so one last time, do you have the stolen diamond or not?”. The suspect instantly replies “no!”. It’s an automatic defense, a fight-or-flight, capiche? What if now, instead of asking again or slamming hands on the table, you stare and say nothing more? It will put pressure on the person and, as thoughts rush through their head, they will weaken up and talk. You probably wouldn’t get that even if you physically injured them but, with invisible silence, it’s possible.
  6. Silence gives you time to reflect about decisions you’ve made and makes you more focused. You get to know yourself better and, by practicing silence, you make better and more clear decisions in the future.

That’s all for today. If you enjoyed this post, share it with those you care about. If you’re new, join the Isle of Monte Cristo by following this blog.

Yours Truly,

Count of Monte Cristo

31 thoughts on “Life Lesson #1: Silence is Powerful. Use it to your advantage.

  1. Silence is sometimes golden. I know I can be hesitant to speak very often as I suppose I second guess whether my comment is of value. Baba used to have a fish picture on her wall that said – even a fish wouldn’t get in trouble if it kept it’s mouth shut.

    Also I think it is important sometimes to hold our tongue and I am thinking of situations of when we are emotional, or upset, angry etc. I think that if we response in the moment that there is the risk of speaking harshly and then feel regret later especially as those words cannot be unspoken.

    Super topic. one observation is the title says Five Benefits and the list has six points. 🙂 Best wishes.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. From what I’ve heard about your baba thus far, I am sure about one thing and that is – he was definitely a wise man. I also agree with you – silence is golden and it really does shine in situations of conflict.

      All of these things life tens to teach us the hard way, myself included. I understand why you may sometime be hesitant and it’s never bad to second-guess yourself. It shows your careful and composed personality.

      Yes, I’ve just noticed it too – thanks for the remark. I’ll change it asap!

      Best wishes and stay safe,
      Monte Cristo

      Liked by 2 people

  2. Silence is also good if you want people to speak. People find it difficult not to fill the silence after about 5 seconds. If you ask a question and nobody answers leave it 10 seconds and usually somebody will say something by the time 10 seconds is up.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Hello Mrs ESTJ! That is one-hundred percent accurate! It’s such a useful tool to have in literally any scenario. It seems so harmless, but the pressure builds up real quick.

      I lead a camp once and noticed how all chocolates from a box went missing. Asked one boy, he instantly replied “no”. 7 seconds did the trick! I’m guessing you’ve used it in the past as well?

      Liked by 1 person

  3. this is great! i’m considered a “quiet person” and i used to be offended by this and felt intimidated by those who talked more, but have found it to be in my favor over the years. looking forward to read lesson #2 !!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Hi AD Defined, your comment has brought warmth to my heart. I’m really glad you found it helpful – and my post entails just some of the benefits, tip of the iceberg! For i.e., now that I’m thinking about it again, quiet people have more respect in the room when they speak (almost never are ignored).

      Lesson #2 is coming up today!

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Non sapevo anche se lo ho pensato che tu, spero sia ok darti del tu, fossi Italiano. Sono molto contenta e grazie per la tua visita. Please follow me as well. I have a dream at 65 one day I might complete it, lol we will see. Un piacere conoscerti, Patrizia Pat.

    Liked by 2 people

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